June Reading Review

Initially, I thought I'd just read enough books to get me to 50 by the end of June, but I actually did quite well and am into the 60's. I'm very pleased with my progress, and it's renewed my enthusiasm for the project.

If you've never read my reviews before, I don't take care about spoilers, so if one of these books is on your "to be read" list, please beware that I may have a spoiler in there. I try not to give away any major plot lines, but sometimes little bits and pieces spill out.

Now, as I think I said in my previous post about Lesley's book challenge, I've lost my reading list for June, so this is right off the top of my head. I can think of 11 books I've read this month, and if there are more, I'll add them in with my July tally.

Without further ado...

1. How To Be Happy, Dammit! A Cynic's Guide to Spiritual Happiness by Karen Salmansohn. There came to a point earlier this year when I would visit my sister's house and our conversations would be like this:

Me: How are you guys?
Joe: All life is travesty.
Judy: I hate everyone. The entire universe is a bunch of f'ing idiots except for me.

If I called on the phone, it was the same. I was getting to the point I couldn't take it any more. I went to Barnes and Noble and out of the blue, How to Be Happy Dammit! called my name.

The book is a quick read full of interesting pictures, funny sayings, and stories. The bright orange cover catches the eye, and the first couple of lessons really grab you and don't let go. But it's not a sugary or saccharine type of self-help book either.

There are 44 lessons in the book and they are all interconnected. It begins with the idea that when you're first born, you're tiny, you don't know what's going on, you've been warm and cozy in your little womb, and then all of a sudden: WHACK! Some idiot on the outside smacks you when you're 3 1/2 seconds old and you've learned your first lessons: Life is not fair, and life occasionally hands out pain for seemingly no good reason. But without it, your little baby self would not grow, and instead you would be dead. I love, love, love this story. And the entire book has these interesting points of view and analogies.

If you're looking for a serene and calming self-help book, this might not be the one for you. BUT! If you want to have some fun learning to have a more positive outlook on life, and you find yourself a little bit cynical of the self help industry, this might just be the one for you.

The book is a very quick read, I read it in about an hour and then Michael and I re-read it outloud together in about an hour's time. Although I was loathe to do so, I did give it to Joe and Judy, and as best I can tell, they've put it in a cupboard and neither one of them has read it. C'est la vie. This book was fun, colorful, and interesting. READ IT!

2. Dark Tort by Diane Mott Davidson. This is the latest Goldie Schulz mystery. Even as I began to read this book, I thought to myself, "God forbid I ever find myself in Aspen Meadow, but if I do, I am never, ever going to become friends with Goldie Schulz." Aspen Meadow in all the books is portrayed as a sleepy small town in the Rockies, affluent, but small. Unfortunately for them, anyone who befriends Goldie tends to wind up extremely dead.

And for some reason, in this particular book, I couldn't quite get past that. The story revolves around a young woman who is found murdered at a law office, where Goldie has recently been hired to cater morning meetings. Goldie has been teaching Dusty to cook and prepare meals, and Dusty it turns out has been schtupping the partners on her way to the top, until she's permanently taken down a few rungs. Dusty also happened to be one of Julian's ex-girlfriends, and a neighbor of the Schulzes before her death, though I can't remember hearing her name ever mentioned in the previous novels.

The book was fine, formulaic Goldie, and I guess maybe I'm getting a wee bit tired of them. I'm sad to say that, as they've always been one of my favorite series of books.

3. Nineteen Minutes by Jodi Piccoult. Jodi Piccoult is one of my favorite writers and I was desperate to get my hands on a copy of this book--so desperate in fact that I actually broke my recent rule about only reading what I could get from Paperback Swap and had my sister pick me up a copy of it. Nineteen Minutes centers around the events in a small New Hampshire town when young Peter goes literally ballistic and shoots up his high school. Peter has endured years of abuse, beginning in kindergarten, at the hands of his peers and teachers, administrators, and his own parents have been unsympathetic about his torment. He goes to school, detonates a bomb, and in the ensuing panic, starts shooting.

The story follows two different families, that of Peter's and that of Josie's--Peter's sometimes friend and the daughter of a judge he may potentially face as part of his trial. Josie leaves Peter behind in grade school, becoming a queen bee, but she has her own personal demons behind being a popular kid and not feeling much like herself--or even knowing who she is if she's not Matt's girlfriend or the smart or pretty girl.

The story was un-put-down-able until the end, and then I thought the end was basically bullshit. (Pardon my Francais, gentle readers) There was a little twist at the end and I thought, "Huh, why the hell did she do that?!" which was also what I was thinking when I read another Piccoult classic, My Sister's Keeper. So I'm going to accept it as "what she does" and come away saying this was a darned good read. Fortunately not the tear jerker My Sister's Keeper was, but good nonetheless.

4. The First Four Years by Laura Ingalls Wilder. I am slow but sure making my way through the Little House books, and this one was so short, it should hardly count. This is the story of the Wilders' first four years of marriage, where they deal with every manner of bad thing that might befall them. Almanzo is determined to make life as a farmer work, although Laura begs him not too. She says she has no interest in being a farm wife, but eventually Almanzo prevails and they head to their own claim and begin life on the farm. Laura's dire predictions prove true, all the more disheartening when they have a small child to fend for. Still, Laura and Almanzo make the best of things in spite of their losing battle.

Apparently this book was so short because Laura never finished writing it, and it was patched together with permission of her daughter, Rose. It was a quick and easy read for some low stress summer reading. I suppose this is as close to cheating as it gets, really, but I don't care. Go read your own 100 if you don't like mine. :-)

5. Ella Minnow Pea by Mark Dunn. I found this book at the Wilderness Library and very nearly didn't buy it. Just looking at the title, the words didn't exactly compute and I thought, "hmmm, this book seems kind of silly." Then I read "A Novel in Letters" and my shameless snoop side came out. I love, love, love reading books that are comprised of letters, I feel like I'm really snooping in someone's mail or diaries, and it makes it so interesting. So I picked up Ella and on my way to the car, said the title out loud and the light went on.

The story is one of letters, literally, written in letters between various people. The fictional town of Nollop is facing a crisis: Named after Nevin Nollop who famously coined the phrase "The quick brown fox jumped over the lazy dog", a statue to its founder in town is falling to pieces. Specifically, letters on tiles comprising the famous sentence are falling off the statue, and the town council has taken that as a sign. The citizenry is officially banned from using any letter which falls off the sign. Failure to restrict use of those letters results first in lashing, and then in banishment from the island. They may neither speak nor write the offending letters. It starts out fairly simply, with the letter Z, but eventually more and more letters drop and it becomes harder and harder to write and speak.

I won't reveal how it is resolved, but it was an excellent story and one that I only wish I had had the cleverness to invent myself. It's a fairly short book as well, so you could read it pretty quickly if you wanted to! Fun and funny, definitely a book for people who love words. Take up the town's challenge yourself and see if you can come up with a sentence...?

6. The Master Quilter by Jennifer Chiaverini. Yet another Elm Creek Quilt book. And yet another about Sylvia. And I was sure I'd hate it and again I loved it. Damn you, Chiaverini!

In this latest read, the Elm Creek Quilters decide they are going to make a surprise for Sylvia Compson and Andrew, her new husband. They send letters, inviting former campers and quilters nationwide to create squares which they will put together as a bridal quilt for Sylvia and Andrew. In the meanwhile, all the Elm Creek Quilters are beset with their own issues: Summer wants to become her own person. Judy struggles with issues surrounding her job and her family. Bonnie has an evil realtor on her tail and her store's profits are doing worse than ever. Diane must contend with her next door neighbor and chief rival, Mary Ann. Agnes struggles over how best to help a friend in need.

It would be pure schlock if it weren't so compelling. Finally back to the Elm Creek Quilters and their lives, which I was desperate to know about, and I was so happy to read about it, I could scarcely care what they were going to do by the end--though I certainly agreed with all the decisions made by each of the women.

I wish these books weren't so fun to read and I wish I didn't have such a visceral reaction to them before I picked each one up. The funny thing is that Judy does too, and consequently, we moan and groan before reading each one and then discuss them ad nauseum. That's when you know it's something good--when you can't wait to share.

7. This Place Has No Atmosphere by Paula Danziger. I'm going to buy Michael a bumper sticker for the car that reads "My money and my wife go to Wilderness Library." I love picking through their book shelves of sale books, and I was thrilled to find another Danziger from my youth. This particular offering marks Danziger's foray into the world of sci fi, telling the tell of young Aurora, an aspiring high school actress whose parents have decided to move the family quite literally to the Moon. Aurora is devastated--she is part of the in-crowd at school, and has no intention of leaving Earth to go to the Moon. Her parents finally agree that she can come home after a year if she hates it. And so, Aurora, her sister, and her parents become space pioneers and Aurora must find her way in a place that has no atmosphere.

The sci fi aspect of the things is really quite silly, but it touches a chord in every kid who never wanted to move or who had issues with their parents. I never moved growing up, although I sometimes thought my life would be easier if I did, but I certainly had typical teenage issues with my parents that were hard to resolve, and I remember loving this book. When I told Judy I had it, she practically ripped it out of my hands, recalling small details I never remembered. A fun, quick read, if you want a little nostalgia mixed in with silly sci fi, you'll enjoy it.

8. Cat on the Scent by Rita Mae and Sneaky Pie Brown. I got a whole pile of books for Christmas and have been slowly trying to make my way through them so as to encourage the givers to give me more books! This is a book my mom sent me in the hopes that I would enjoy the series.

I had this particular series confused with the "The Cat Who..." books, and hadn't really heard of these books. Apparently, they center around a small cadre of animals who live in a little Virginia town in Albemarle County with the post mistress. Crimes happen in Crozet, and the animals are a step ahead of the humans in solving them. The leader of the animals seems to be a large cat named Mrs. Murphy, and she has a couple of other animals, a cat called Pewter, and a corgi called Tucker, with whom she fights crime and criminals in town.

Although the humans tell the animals to be quiet, they are often shocked to discover that the animals know the locations of important clues to solving mysteries.

In this particular book, the mystery is what happened to a downed plane and pilot, and who shot Sir H. Vane-Tempest during a Civil War re-enactment. Of course the animals know what happened, but the humans are a little slow on the uptake. One of the best scenes is when the 3 animals shanghai a Porsche and hot rod around Virginia's hills.

I am glad to have received and read this book, though I would very much like to read the first in the series to see if I understand the books and people a bit better. I understand from reading reviews of the books that many people want to know if the post mistress and her ex-husband will ever remarry, but I wasn't invested in that particular plot line. I suspect if I do read these from the start, I'll be quite invested in them. Brown makes the books pretty easy to read--the animals' conversations are in italics and the humans are in regular print. A good read, but a bit confusing. I'll have to read more!! (Thanks, Mom!)

9. Two for the Dough by Janet Evanovich. This is another Stephanie Plum book and I'm getting Mike into these. We're reading them together and enjoying them a great deal. I can't say much about them other than I love them and I'll continue reading them till she quites writing them. It's been fun to go back to the beginning to hear about things before Stephanie and Morelli were really serious.

This book centers around the funeral home where Grandma Mazur likes to get her social interaction on a near nightly basis. Stephanie is hired by the sleezy owner to be his personal bodyguard and to find some property of his that has been stolen by his equally unscrupulous business associate--who happens to be Morelli's cousin.

Of course I love the books. My favorite is upcoming--four and ten are amazing--but the first few are real good. And even though they are formulaic, they remain witty and I never tire of them. I've told Judy to get me 13 and she better not have forgotten (hint, hint). I'm dying to read it.

10. Along Came a Spider by James Patterson. Again, having run through almost the entire Grisham library, we knew we needed to find someone else to read, and I decided Michael would enjoy the Alex Cross series by James Patterson. So we've started. I will never again read Kiss the Girls, which was more disturbing than I could say, so I got Along Came a Spider and we read this together over our vacation in RI/NY.

The story introduces Gary Soneji, brilliant psychopathic serial killer, who will become Cross's nemesis for some books to come. In this, Soneji kidnaps the daughter of a prominent movie star and the son of a prominent government official. Pulled off a seemingly unrelated case, the brilliant Alex Cross is forced onto this case against his will, but soon realizes he's matching wits with someone who truly needs to be reckoned with.

I really enjoyed this particular book, and I enjoyed reading it in the past. It was one that stuck with me and I remembered the ending of it, so it was no surprise, but what surprised me was how much I enjoyed getting through the story to see how it all tied together. The mind games that Soneji played with Cross made for some riveting reading and we hated to put it down even for a second. If you've never read a Patterson/Cross book, this is a great place to start.

11. The Last Days of Summer by Steve Kluger. I've saved the best for last. This was my favorite book of June and one of my favorites this year, and quite probably one of my all time favorites. I laughed until I cried and then I turned around and cried until I laughed.

Joey Margolis is a wise-cracking kid living tough in Brooklyn. Charlie Banks is a typical dumb jock who makes it big playing baseball for the Giants. They strike up an unlikely penpalship and the results draw in Joey's mother and aunt, his teacher, and Charlie's teammates and girlfriend, Hazel McKay, a singer competing with Ethel Merman in the clubs of New York.

The story begins with Joey in trouble with the law after a street fight with some other kids. He is interviewed by police and begins writing letters to Charlie Banks, trying to get him to acknowledge Joey's presence on the radio so the other kids in school will think Joey's a big deal. The nastier Charlie gets with Joey, the more he can't stop replying to Joey's letters and an unlikely friendship is formed.

The story also shares Joey's letters to FDR, Joey's report cards, police reports, "and etc." (as Charlie frequently writes in the book). It contains such literary gems as the sentence "There is not one shred of historical evidence to support the idea that Dolley Madison was a lesbian." And I frankly loved Charlie calling FDR "Muffinmouth."

The book begins in 1941 and carries through World War II. About 50 pages before the end, it's clear how the book will end, but even that didn't bother me. The book is not about sports, so if you're anti-baseball or anti-sports, you won't be bored with it. Instead, the story is that of an unlikely friendship between a boy who needs someone in his life and a man becoming that person against his will and with a little prodding from the people around him.

Joey's mom and aunt reminded me a lot of my own family, and I swear I could hear my mom's voice in my head as I read the letters from Joey's mother.

I cannot possibly describe what a great book this is. Take my word for it, get a copy, read it and re-read it. Once I get it back from my dad, to whom I lent it and who also loved the hell out if it, I'll be reading it again and again for years to come.

Thus endeth June.

It was a good month for reading, partly because I spent the last few days out at the pool and with my mother-in-law who is now reading 10 books per week (darn her!). To break it down:

The Excellent: Last Days of Summer

The Great: How to Be Happy, Dammit!, Ella Minnow Pea, The Master Quilter

The Good: Nineteen Minutes, Two for the Dough, Along Came a Spider, This Place Has No Atmosphere, Cat On the Scent

The OK: Dark Tort, The First Four Years

The Awful: N/A

Totals for June:

Books Read: 11
Pages Read: 3452

Totals for 2007:

Books Read: 57
Pages Read: 18,504

Armchair Traveler Book Challenge, Entry 1

Ok, the challenge has only just begun and already I've changed a book choice for it. I'm writing this tonight and skipping ahead of my June books, since a) I don't feel like writing nearly a dozen book reviews tonight, and b) I lost my list of what I read while on my travels. So, I'm going to skip ahead to my new selection for the book challenge and I'm debating what I'm going to get rid of in the mean time.

So, my first book for the Armchair Traveler Challenge is
The Glass Castle by Jeannette Walls. It is a memoir Walls wrote about growing up with her eclectic parents: alcoholic dad Rex and dreamer mom Rose Mary. The Walls family lives like nomads at the beginning of the book--packing up in the middle of the night and leaving whatever home they're in to escape bill collectors, police, and child welfare workers. They travel around the US Southwest until their money runs out, and they are forced to move in with Rex's family in West Virginia. At this point, the Walls children start to plan their escape from the craziness of their upbringing and make plans to go to New York City to start fresh, new lives where they are unknown.

I borrowed this book from Lauren, and I hadn't really considered using it for the challenge, I think because I wasn't really sure what it was all about. However, the writing was superb and the description of the family homes and travels led me to think about using it as my first choice. Walls vividly describes the succession of crumbling homes and small towns where they live with such talent that you can picture where she is, despite never having been there. Having recently visited the Southwest for the first time, I had a better understanding of how desolate the little towns could be and what the landscape was like, and it was interesting to hear of the Walls family's issues with the law and how they continued to move and soldier on in the face of incredible odds.

I thought I'd share a few passages of the book where the descriptions were quite good and made me think of where they were. (All material copyright Jeannette Walls)

We moved around like nomads. We lived in dusty little mining towns in Nevada, Arizona, and California. They were usually nothing but a tiny cluster of sad, sunken shacks, a gas station, a dry-goods store, and a bar or two. They had names like Needles and Bouse, Pie, Goffs, and Why, and they were near places like the Superstition Mountains, the dried up Soda Lake, and the Old Woman Mountain. The more desolate a place, the better Mom and Dad liked it... Mom had grown up in the desert. She loved the dry, crackling heat, the way the sky at sunset looked like a sheet of fire, and the overwhelming emptiness and severity of all that open land that had once been a huge ocean bed...

I have a feel for the places, although I've never been and probably never will.
She didn't use a lot of words to describe the places, but you definitely had a sense of where they were and what they could see.

I'm just going to tuck in a description of one town they lived in, Battle Mountain, as it was one of my favorite places they lived.

Battle Mountain had started out as a mining post, settled a hundred years earlier by people hoping to strike it rich, but if anyone ever had struck it rich in Battle Mountain, they must have moved somewhere else to spend their fortune. Nothing about the town was grand except the big empty sky and, off in the distance, the stony purple Tuscarora Mountains running down the table-flat desert.

The main street was wide--with sun-bleached cars and pickups parked at an angle to the curb--but only a few blocks long, flanked on both sides with low, flat-roofed buildings made of adobe or brick. A single streetlight flashed red day and night. Along Main Street was a grocery store, a drugstore, a Ford dealership, a Greyhound bus station, and two big casinos, the Owl Club and the Nevada Hotel. The buildings, which seemed puny under the huge sky, had neon signs that didn't look like they were on during the day because the sun was so bright.

In Battle Mountain, the Wallses moved into an old building on the railroad tracks, and rather than purchase more furniture they'd have to leave behind, the children slept inside refrigerator boxes and they all used large industrial spools for tables and chairs. I can't even imagine it.

Eventually the elder Wallses become homeless after following their children to NYC (this is not a spoiler, considering on the first page, Jeannette talks about seeing her mom dumpster diving). There was a quality about Rex and Rose Mary--crazy though they were--that I liked. At the end, when their squatting leads to an opportunity to buy a place in the building, it's almost as if the optimist in Rose Mary knew it would all work out. Rex's alcoholism and the issues of his family certainly are disturbing--particularly in Rex's dismissal of claims of sexual abuse against the children--and yet there's something that leads you to pity Rex as well and feel a warmth for him as he does his best to keep the children free and moving.

A great book, a lot of great places and people, all of it sticks with you quite vividly, and I was pleased that the places played as important a role as the people and the story. One down, five to go :-) I hope they're all this good!

I'm Back

And it's gonna take me a while to catch up.

All hell has broken loose here in VA since we've gotten home--everything from our house apparently being battered by storms while we were away and thus our cable connection crapped out and we had no phone or internet to my dad breaking my new camera to being given the cold shoulder by Marisa Tomei (yes, that Marisa Tomei, and yes, she's the latest celeb to hit the Susan Kosior Celeb Shit List).

I swear I'll be back soon--I have my June book reviews to write, I have my first book review for Lesley's book challenge to write, I have emails to return (Lara, if you're out there, you'll hear from me soon), and heck, I suppose I should unpack one of these days!!

We left on Thursday, June 28th, got home Saturday, left again Sunday, and it's now (early) Tuesday morning and I've just gotten home. After Wednesday, I'll be able to take a breather, write everything I need to write, everything I want to write, and everything in between.

Till then, be patient with me :-)

Visiting the Fams...

Blogging will be non-existent until the end of next week while we are visiting with some of our family. Hope everyone has a safe and happy July 4th.

Oops

Yesterday was our big semi-annual office birthday party, for people whose birthdays are January through June.

This year, in addition to being in charge of the cakes, I was in charge of the goody bags. I also picked the theme, which was "Old Time Rock N Roll"--kind of a retro 50's and 60's thing.

So for the goodie bags, I got retro toys--jacks, magic 8 balls, slinkies, etc.

After eating, everyone was tearing into their toys and one of the secretaries mentioned that she had been the jacks champion at her school. Another co-worker mentioned that she loved playing with jacks.

My friend Debbie said (and this is a direct quote):

"Hey! We should have a jacks play off! Let's have a jack off!"

It got dead quiet on the pavillion and then we all started to roar. Love those times you don't know what you've said and then you figure it out... That one's going to make Debbie famous for a while. :-)

Sub Hunting

Michael and I are on a quest. We are going to find the perfect sub sandwich if it kills us. I've eaten 3 subs in the last days, but I won't rest till I find the best!

My family has been lamenting the death of the "Gearsbeck Sub" for some time now. Gearsbeck's was a gas station/convenience store in my hometown. They had the best subs in town. Those suckers were jam packed with meat, and then crammed wtih lettuce, tomatoes, onions, mayo, and italian dressing. They were so big, you couldn't fit your mouth around them. They were so big, you could only eat a half (or a 6 incher to the uninitiated). You only had your choice of ham, turkey, or roast beef, but it didn't matter. What they lacked in variety, they more than made up for in quality.

But the owner sold the business and left town. A new family took over, and while they still have subs, they're just average. Nothing special.

Now I live in Virginia. The independent sub shop is becoming a thing of the past. We've got Subway, Quiznos... But I want to find something to rival those damned subs.

And the funny thing is, it's hard to find cold subs! Everyone's into toasting things around here.

So last weekend we started. We eliminated Subway and Quizno's, as we had been to both and knew what they had to offer. Quizno's is way too expensive, and Subway is fine for a quick meal, but having worked there, I know we can do better. So we went to a place called Zero's, since we had a buy one get one free coupon.

Apparently, Zero's might also be a chain, but we'd never heard of them and never been there. I doubt we'll go back. They're another hot sub place, and this time they even put my mayo through the toaster. I thought I was gonna gag. The place was OK, on a par with Quizno's, but also quite expensive (even with the BOGO coupon, our bill was over $15). Michael loved their tomato sauce. He's giving everyone a fair shot--ordering meatball subs wherever we go, but I am having a harder time since I just want to find a good turkey sub and the places we've gone to only have tuna or chicken salad as cold subs. AUGH!

Ok, so the next day we went to Firehouse Subs. This was Subway's chief competitor when I was slinging sandwiches in Little Rock. Again, hot subs, again, not that amazing. Michael preferred Zero's sauce, and I was just glad not to eat hot mayo. The total bill was $15 without any specials, so that was nice. Unfortunately, no cold subs except chicken or tuna salad, so I tried the chicken salad. They put enough on the sandwich that it was falling off, but it wasn't so great that I really wanted to eat it all anyway (my sister's chicken salad is to die for, so chicken salad really has to wow me, and this didn't).

Ok, so we'd exhausted the chains. That left the one local joint we could find, which we went to tonight: Cap'n Sids Subs and Sandwiches.

Now, silly me, I was thinking that if I were a local guy up against a bunch of chains, I'd be busting my butt to make sure I made the best damned subs in the universe.

Not Cap'n Sid, who was most definitely not named Sid, nor was he a Cap'n. He was a pissed off little Chinese man. Michael got the meatballs again and I ordered the Italian. It was kind of confusing to know what was on the sandwiches, since the signboard had been kind of thrown up there and mentioned a few things like "pcheese" and "a" that came with your sandwich. But whatever. So my Italian came with "Salami and Ham and Genoa Salami" but when I got it, there was bologna on it, and I most definitely hate bologna. Disappointment #1. Michael's sandwich was just OK, and he was very disappointed with the small thing of fries. The place seems to be a magnet for middle aged men. I thought it was the worst place we've been to thus far. Michael thought that perhaps it would be a bit harsh to say that, but he wasn't that crazy about it either.

We've decided we have to move further afield to find the right place. I'll try to find some places on my varied travels around VA and hopefully we'll find something good. There's a NoVa chain called Jerry's that has pretty decent subs, but I want an AWESOME sub. We won't rest till we find it!

Lesley's Armchair Travel Challenge

Well, when your best bud announces a reading challenge, you better hop on board and get ready to ride!

Lesley is hosting an "Armchair Traveler" reading challenge, and I've decided to participate. For more information, visit Lesley's site (A Life In Books listed on the left, I can't make the HTML cooperate today) and read the rules.

My 6 selections are:

The Lost Continent by Bill Bryson (travels around the US)
Wanda Hickey's Night of Golden Memories by Jean Shepherd (US Midwest)
Lost and Foundby Carolyn Parkhurst (centers around an "Amazing Race" type contest)
Dispatches from the Edge by Anderson Cooper (international)
The Christmas Train by David Baldacci (Transcontinental US)
There's a(Slight) Chance I Might Be Going to Hell by Laurie Notaro (Oregon)

It's going to kill me not to start that last one till July, but I have plenty of other reading to do, so what the heck. I might switch some of these out in due course, but for now, that's what I've come up with!

Bon Voyage!

Laurie Notaro in DC

Judy's favorite humor writer (apart from Dave Barry of course) is Laurie Notaro. I stumbled upon her a couple of years ago, and the title of her book, We Thought You'd Be Prettier, was so great, I had to get a copy. I thought it was amusing, but Judy thought it was hilarious, became a devout fan and bought all the Laurie Notaro books out at the time. She has since built up the entire library, including The Idiot Girls Action Adventure Club and I Love Everybody (and Other Atrocious Lies).

Well, we found out she was coming to DC and decided to go. Of all the authors I've met in person over the past couple of years, this was the first one I really wanted to take to dinner and have as a friend.

Oh sure, the others have all been alternately entertaining, funny, charming, sweet, nice, friendly, etc. but Laurie was all that and down-to-earth and about my age and she had such a personality, just so much fun. She spoke and read for an hour and a half and then posed for pictures (the above picture is her cure for a double chin), signed endless copies of her books. It was great. I seriously considered going to Fairfax last night where she was signing again just to be in her presence. But it was too far, and Friday night traffic on top of it, so I ruled it out.

Next up? Tina Louise on the 23rd. Yup. Ginger is coming to Virginia. Should be interesting.

Blast from the Past

Did you ever just have one of those "Holy Sh*t" moments? I had one yesterday.

We were up late on Saturday evening, since the Red Sox game went into extra innings in Ari-freakin'-zona. I think we finally fell asleep around 2:30am.

I awoke at 9:00 and checked my email and lo and behold, I had a very important message from an old friend. Todd.

Todd and I met when we were sophomores at Manhattan College. He was a transfer student, and was one of Joe's housemates. Joe introduced me to him and he was a lot of fun and eventually became one of the group of people I surrounded myself with--all quality. Todd was my date to the Jolly Jasper Jingle (aka Christmas Ball) our junior year.

Todd was in DC. For about another 8 hours. And he wanted to see us.

Well, there was no question. The last time I saw him was in April of 1998. Joe hadn't seen him since May 1997. We quickly made plans and got together.

It was like those 10 years evaporated. It was so much fun. We reminisced about things we'd done, people we'd known, and it was way too short--only 3 hours.

Todd is living and working now in Sri Lanka, and is just here till July 8th, so I doubt I'll get to see him again for a while. He'll be there until December and then has to decide what to do next. He may move to DC. I don't know if we could stand to have that much fun together. The three of us, it was almost as good as being back at college.

So tonight I'm grateful for old friends. Because sometimes there's just no one else you can rely on to understand the you that you were before you became the person you are now--and no amount of story telling can bring that person back. It was so much fun to giggle over the 21 year old Sue, Joe, and Todd. It was a most special afternoon. I treasure those 3 hours already.

(Yeah, I'm feeling mushy and sentimental. Get over it.)

Etc.

It's sick, but I suddenly cannot get enough of this Paris Hilton circus. Seriously.

Oh, and I went to a library book sale today and got a book with THE COOLEST TITLE EVER! Ella Minnow Pea by Mark Dunn. I sure hope it's going to be good.

That's all for today, except I've driven around for the last two days screaming: I HATE THE TRAFFIC HERE!!! I HATE THE HOT WEATHER HERE!!!

May Reading Review

Well, thanks to a couple of audiobooks (is that cheating? I don't think so, but some might), I got up to 10 books this month instead of 6. Also, I miscounted before leaving for SC, so I was at 8 books when I left home, not 6.

As always, there is a risk of SPOILERS in every last one of these books I'm reviewing. Please consider skipping a review if it's a book you plan to read and don't want the surprises ruined.

1. Bet Me by Jennifer Crusie. This is my ultimate guilty pleasure, beach book piece of fluff, and consequently I read it in its entirety while I was at the beach this weekend. Whenever I'm in the dumps, there are 2 books I pick up, and this piece of hardcover romantic comedy is one of them. When I broke my leg, I probably read it 5 times in those 3 months.

Bet Me is the story of Min Dobbs, insurance actuarial at large. She is "chubby" by her mother's standards, has a fetish for fun shoes, has lousy luck picking men, adores her sister and her two best friends, and is a die hard Elvis Presley fan. As the story opens, Min is being dumped by her "I-oughta-love-him" boyfriend, David, a sleazy software developer who dumps Min in a bar, as she won't "put out" for him after 3 months.

Cal Morrissey is a risk taking golden boy, gorgeous, rich, self assured, and afraid of commitment. He happens to be at the same bar that Min and David are at. On a bet from David, he takes Min to dinner. The bet is altogether more complicated than that, but I don't want to give too much away.

Min knows Cal's reputation as a playboy, and upon overhearing the bet being made, decides she'll string him along for 3 weeks and get him to take her to her sister Diana's wedding. But can she?

Despite their best efforts, they fall for each other. Min struggles as much to reject Cal as he does to come to terms with the feelings that he's finally met the woman of his dreams. But the bet may very well come back to haunt them.

Yeah right. It's a romantic comedy, not a tragedy.

2. One For the Money by Janet Evanovich. I love Janet Evanovich's numbers series. They are light, fun reading, very New Jersey, and I've been trying to get the General to read them for some time now. I had him as a captive audience in the car this weekend, and picked up the first 3 numbers books on CD for our car ride home from Myrtle Beach. Though he tried to resist and get me to read a James Patterson novel, I won out. Nyah Nyah.

One for the Money is, obviously, the first in the Stephanie Plum novels, and I haven't read it in ages, so I truly did not remember it. It opens with Stephanie broke after losing her latest job as a lingerie buyer and her car is repossessed. She's in danger of eviction, has sold off her furniture and needs a job. Her father hears that her cousin Vinnie is hiring in his bail bonds office, and though Stephanie arrives to get a job filing papers, Connie the Secretary convinces her to track down skips instead. Her first target? Joe Morelli, who we know from later books will become one of two of Stephanie's love interests.

The book is great. It sets up everything for the rest of the series--from Stephanie's car being blown up to the evil Benito Ramirez, to Grandma Mazur and Stephanie's mom, to Lula, Connie, Ranger, Vinnie, and Joe. And let's not forget Rex the Hamster.

If you have never read Janet Evanovich, you should. I love her. The only books that make me laugh out loud every time I read them. I'll leave it at that.

3. The Brethren by John Grisham. Where I selected Janet Evanovich, Michael picked Grisham. The Brethren is the compelling story of 3 federal judges, now sitting in a minimum security prison after being convicted of varying degrees of felonies. They reign over their fellow prisoners and are busy with a mail scam they've devised, when they hook a very big fish indeed. Aaron Lake, frontrunning presidential candidate, responds to a personal ad the judges plant in a gay men's magazine. And once they figure out who they've got, they're not willing to let go without a little bargaining. Only they have no idea who they are trying to bargain with, and those boys play for keeps.

This was a very suspenseful book. Two apparently divergent story lines, the one of the judges and the one of Aaron Lake's run for the presidency, continue on for some time, and we were wondering how it would all come together. Classic Grisham, of course the plots became intertwined and there is a good bit of murder and mayhem thrown in to keep you on the edge of your seat. Great read, although not my favorite of his books. (That honor belongs to The Chamber.)

4. My Life by Bill Clinton. It is truly a testament to the number of miles I clock every month for work that I was able to read Bill Clinton's autobiography in my car in one week. I suspect that most people know about this book, as it was a huge splash when it was released several years ago. In it, Clinton recounts his life from his humble beginnings in Arkansas (where he not only shares his own memories, but those the family has passed down) to his rise to power in the Oval Office to the scandal of the Monica Lewinsky mess and the hope that Hillary's senate run brought with it.

Frankly, I thought that this was all a little bit glossy and a little bit slick. While I personally think that Clinton was one of the finer presidents we've had, albeit that he disappointed us greatly, when I moved to Arkansas, I discovered that the people there had voted for him to get him the hell out of their state. Upon talking to Tal, I learned more about all this.

The book, as with any autobiography, is a bit self aggrandizing, glosses over the scandals that beset him throughout his political career, and gives way to bragging about his achievements as an attorney, attorney general, governor, and President.

I'm glad I read it, but at the end of the day, it was definitely a little too slick for me to say I LOVE IT. Still, if you're stuck in the car for prolonged periods of time and want something to listen to, it beats War and Peace -- or so I presume.

5. The Runaway Quilt by Jennifer Chiaverini. DAMN HER.

Judy brought me the first Elm Creek Quilters novel and I was kind of disgusted with it in the beginning, but the story turned gripping and I couldn't help myself. I wound up liking it.

This has been the story with every single freakin' Elm Creek Quilts book I've read consequently, and number four was no different. I approached it with a "Here we go again" attitude, and yet couldn't help myself from reading it.

In this novel, Sylvia Compson is approached at a lecture by a woman who has an antique quilt which she claims has significance to Elm Creek Manor. She claims that the quilt was passed down through her family and legend has it that it served as a signal that Elm Creek Manor served as a station on the Underground Railroad. Sylvia is disturbed and goes home to root through her attic, wherein she stumbles upon her grandmother's sister's diaries and 3 more quilts. As Sylvia reads through the diary, she learns about a troubling period in her family's past and comes to question her very existence.

Ok, I must admit, this was my least favorite of the Elm Creek Quilt books so far. The best part of the book was the diary of Sylvia's relative. In this book, the dignified and revered Sylvia devolves into a needy, self absorbed idiot. The twist at the end, when it is revealed that Sylvia herself may in fact be 1/8th African-American, and wherein she calls the apparently one A-A person she knows, who responds with a tepid, "Welcome to my world" was just plain stupid. Sylvia meanwhile ignores and/or fights with her friends, ignores the campers, and ignores love interest Andrew. What's worse is that apparently at one point in the book, my favorite characters from the last book were at the camp and scarcely get a mention. This, to me, would have been a great time to provide a little series continuity, but instead, Chiaverini glosses over their attendance and focuses on Sylvia's despair over her family sellouts. UGH!!

Not her best. I already hate myself for wanting to read #5, and it better be better than #4.

6. Reading Lolita in Tehran by Azar Nafisi. This was my biggest disappointment of a book this year. I had been wanting to read this for a while and finally got a copy via PBS. The book description tells of a group of women who defy the Iranian regime by holding weekly meetings in their beloved literature professor's home in Tehran. Having read Princess by Jean Sasson (and if you haven't yet read it, what the heck are you waiting for?!) and loved it, I thought I would enjoy Reading Lolita a whole lot more than I did.

In fact, the story does begin with the literature club, but devolves into Nafisi's overall memoir of teaching literature in Iran, living through the revolution, the war with Iraq and eventually meanders back to her women's literature club, just before she emigrates to the US.

By the time I realized how seriously I hated this book, I was 200 pages into it. With only 150 to go, it seemed stupid to quit, so I finished it. I did consult with Lesley, who I consider my reading guru, and she confirmed reading a whole 20 pages before giving up. So I don't feel alone in hating it, and that makes me happy. Yes, I know, I have zero self-esteem about my own opinions, but deal.

7. Gods in Alabama by Joshilynn Jackson. Arlene Fleet makes a deal with God. She will never lie, fornicate, or return home to Alabama, so long as He agrees never to reveal where the body is hidden. After 9 years living in Chicago as a celibate, honest literature lovin' professional, an unexpected visitor arrives to find out what happened to the person Arlene has killed and vows to find out. So Arlene packs up her long suffering boyfriend and hauls ass to Alabama to make sure her biggest secret remains so.

God what a book. While stereotypical about the residents of Dixie, the characters were funny, engaging, and Arlene's pain and fear about her secret are palpable in every page. I made myself go slow and savor it. I'm so glad I did.

8. Sleeping Arrangements by Laura Shaine Cunningham. This wonderful little gem is Cunningham's autobiography about an unusual upbringing in the Bronx. As a child, she and her mother moved to an apartment at AnaMor Towers in the Bronx. She runs wild with another child in the neighborhood and becomes rather unrestrained herself. Sadly, her mother passes away, and her two bachelor uncles arrive on the scene, with their own idiosyncracies. They move their mother in and thus begins Laura's new life as an orphan.

If you loved the movie "Unstrung Heroes" or even just liked it, you will definitely enjoy this book. This was another of those "force myself to slow down and savor it" type of things. I loved it. There were parts when Laura is running around with her friend Diana that were profoundly disturbing, dont' get me wrong. But when her uncles arrive on the scene, it's so much fun. She's depressed and angry about school and hates her teacher, so her uncle packs her up and they travel to Cuba. Returning home, he asks, "Doesn't this put it all in perspective?" as they reflect on the beggars and others they've met on their journey. This is a must read. I absolutely loved it.

9. Remember Me to Harold Square by Paula Danziger. This was a favorite when I was a kid. Kendra Kaye is a 14 year old Manhattanite, facing a summer in the city alone while her BFF's escape to summer camps and family homes in the Hamptons. Kendra dreads day after day, stuck at home with her annoying little brother, Oscar. But Mom and Dad have other plans. Their friends, the Lees, are sending their son, Frank, to NYC for the summer, and together, the 4 parents have put together a city-wide scavenger hunt for the 3 kids to complete. They will travel all over NYC and learn history, culture, language, food... And if they complete their mission? They will win a trip to England.

I know, it already sounds like pretty much the greatest kids' book ever written, doesn't it? I thought so then, I think so now. And I love Paula Danziger, I love every book she ever wrote. So even better.

10. The Note by Angela Hunt. Not as bad as Lolita, but I have to tell you, the fact that I finished this one is a testament to the sheer power of human determination.

En route to Tampa from NYC, a flight crashes into the Gulf of Mexico, killing all on board. Several days later, a note reading "T, All is forgiven, I love you. Dad" washes up on a beach and a woman gives the note to struggling journalist Peyton MacGruder, who uses the note to jumpstart her failing career as "The Heart Healer", a sort-of-advice columnist. MacGruder finds three survivors of plane crash victims who potentially fit the bill to be the recipients of the note. Word gets out and a TV journalist wants in. So not only is MacGruder struggling--you know what? I'm bored writing this synopsis. This book sucked. Plain and simple sucked. At the end, the absolutely ridiculous twist in which Peyton's family struggles are revealed just make the whole thing insipid and dumb. Don't bother with this one. Really. I'm saving you a lot of time.

So that's my May list. If I can read four in June, I'm still on track. But frankly, reading 100 is not really as much of a passion for me as it was in January. I'm enjoying the different books I've read and the selection has been fun, but the numbers are becoming meaningless. Plus, you'll note I didn't read this month's book club selection. I feel really bad about that, but what can I do? I just didn't have time. :-(

In summary:

The Great: Bet Me, Sleeping Arrangements, One for the Money, Gods in Alabama, Remember Me to Harold Square

The Good: The Brethren

The OK: My Life, The Runaway Quilt

The Awful: Reading Lolita in Tehran, The Note

Totals for May:

Books Read: 10
Pages Read: 3972

Totals for 2007:

Books Read: 46
Pages Read: 15,052

Myrtle Beach 2007

It was a gate-confusin', happy arrivin', Southern talkin', new car drivin', NC-only-soda drinkin', Steak-N-Shake'n', seafood eatin', mini golfin', sightseein', beach bummin', sunbathin', skin-burnin', pool swimmin', hot tubbin', aloe smearin', Barefoot Landin', game playin', TV watchin', geocachin', gossipin' and chattin', picture takin', ice cream eatin', Strip cruisin', chop bustin', readin', relaxin', fireworks buyin', Balderdashin', wave ridin', kite flyin', bookstore searchin', sheet washin', sad to be leavin', good damned time.

We love you guys. Miss you already. When can we go again?

It's Myrtle Beach Time!

Well, the time has come for us to depart on our vacation wonderland, Myrtle Beach :-)

Try not to miss me too much.

I've been such a slacker reading this month, I'm ashamed to post my book reviews. I'm giving myself an extra weekend to try to bulk up my May total of 6. Yeah. 6.

See you again on Sunday!

Stupid Parents Again

Tal was right. And I swear, Fredericksburg is at the epicenter of a plague of stupid parents.

Last night, Michael and I went out to dinner at a kid friendly place (Pizza Hut). There were two women seated at the table behind us, of whom I had a clear view, and with them, they had 3 children. One of the women was the mother, the other a friend or ?? The two older children were in the 7-10 range and the little guy was maybe 2.

They were seated and no sooner were they, then the two women dug out their cell phones and called people. The two oldest kids were bearing it pretty well, but the little one was not happy. He was squirming between the two of them, and making some noise, till Mom huffed into the phone and said she had to go. Finally the other one hung up as well.

Next thing, the little guy grabs the menu so Mom's friend couldn't read it. Mom was finished with her menu, and Friend was trying to convince him that she needed to see the menu for just one minute, but he refused to give it to her. So she said, "OK, I'll just have to take Mommy's." This sent the little guy into a fury and he starts screaming.

She takes Mom's menu, and this little guy hauls off and smacks her one with the menu, screaming his head off.

Now, internally I was cheering, but I was waiting to see what the discipline would be for such a thing. And all Mom does is turn to him and say, "That's not very nice."

They didn't take the menu away, they didn't yell at him, nothing.

If I had ever hit an adult, be it with a laminated piece of paper or a 2x4, my ass would have been grass. At the very least, my rear would have been put into a high chair and my movements restrained, but most likely in a restaurant, my parents would have picked me up and we would have left without dinner. And once would have been all it would take for me to learn the lesson we didn't hit people, much less Aunt Frannie who's been so nice to us.

I just shook my head as their phones rang all night and Little Jeffrey (or whatever his name was) started eating off the floor and hollering his head off whenever he felt like it. People like that really piss me off.

Are We Getting Stupider, Part Deux

Alright, in our latest attempt to annihilate the human race entirely by our own stupidity, I return to another rant about stupid people.

I have noticed a disturbing trend over the past, oh, I dunno, 10 years, but tonight it really hit home, almost literally.

What the hell is wrong with people letting their kids run around in parking lots!?

Tonight, the General and I went to Target to pick up some supplies for the house and for me to get a nice new kite to take to Myrtle Beach (Hello Kitty kicks ass!). In any event, we get back in the car, and as I am pulling out, a woman WALKS BEHIND US WITH HER TWO CHILDREN! We weren't "maybe" pulling out. We were actually pulling out and they walked behind us.

I wish I could say this were not something I face on a regular basis, but at least 3 times a week, someone walks behind me AFTER I start pulling my car out of my parking space.

One time, there was a woman who let her two year old run all by himself towards their car in a Walmart parking lot, and as I started to pull out, I heard a scream and she ran up to the car in the nick of time. A 2 or 3 foot tall little person cannot be seen in the rearview mirror.

For the love of God. Why do people seem to think that a car going backwards can't hit them!?

AUGH!

WTF? LOST!

Tonight was the season finale of LOST, undoubtedly the best show on television. What a nail biter it was, literally.

I don't know anyone who watches it other than me, Joe, and Judy, so we always watch it and I call them during the commercial breaks.

Tonight, when it was over, all I could say was "Holy sh*t!"

From Hurley's heroic ride in the ancient VW to contact with the outside world to flash forwards and flashbacks, it was one hell of a way to cap one hell of a season. This past several months' worth of episodes has been incredible. It has been non-stop, grab you by the throat, balls to the wall, thrill a minute, amazing TV.

And even though I'm sad that it's over for what COULD be this year (2007), they left it in such a way that I'm almost glad it's over for the season so I can catch my breath. The first two seasons were great, but this season has been absolutely incredible. God bless the creators. I'll be tuning in on the website to see it again without all the commercials, and I just know it's going to be even more amazing.

A Red Letter Day in Health Land

So, today was the big day. My once in a while annual physical. Meaning, my last physical was in 2004, so even though it's supposed to be annual, it's only whenever I get up the courage to go.

I have always hated going to the doctor's office. When I was little (4 years old), I didn't want to get off my mother's lap for a check up or a shot or something at the doctor's office, and the doctor grabbed my legs and my mother grabbed my arms and they lifted me up onto the examining table. I was kicking something fierce, and kicked the doctor right in the stomach. I immediately knew I was "bad" and when the appointment was over, I went into hiding.

I've had a strong dislike for the medical profession ever since. That doctor and the ones to follow have never been unpleasant or mean to me. I had an excellent doctor in Boston, but have never really felt comfortable with any doctor.

Till moving to DC.

When you're F-A-T fat, it's hard to find a doctor you can rely on to talk to you and listen to your concerns without saying, "if you'd just lose weight, this issue would go away." Because frankly, I've been overweight most of my life, and it hasn't slowed me down any.

Moving to Virginia, though, the writing was on the wall. My dad became diabetic, and it was clearly time to make sure I was doing OK. The General of course, doesn't have these issues, so he was ready to go.

Living in Boston, we had been turned onto a website that lists doctors who are "fat friendly" and had added our PCP there to the list. Coming to VA, it seemed natural to try that list to find someone, and I liked the write up about a Dr. David Leonard. So I gave a call, and went in for my first head-to-toe inspection in at least 5 years.

If anything, the writer understated the excellent care you could receive from Dr. Leonard and his staff. The office is proudly adorned with articles from Washingtonian and Washington Magazine touting Dr. Leonard as one of the top doctors in DC. One magazine surveyed 54 of his patients and he scored 100/100 points for all areas of satisfaction.

If I could give him 200, I would. And I would for every last doctor on his staff. I have seen the 2 women doctors there and went with the General while he consulted with the other male doctor, and we have been treated with courtesy and respect by every last person on that staff, from the receptionists to the nurses to the lab techs.

Still, old habits die hard, and until one of his associates informed me over the winter that I should be darned sure to get my butt in for another physical, I kept on putting it off. Finally, the General announced we were going and I should make the appointments, and for some reason, that seemed right and I did.

Our appointments were this morning.

I got called in first, almost as if they knew I might chicken out, and was given an EKG to check on my heart. It was 100% fine, shipshape. The nurse gave me a gown and then Dr. Leonard arrived and he actually took the time to re-acquaint himself with me as a human being and not just some specimen on a table. We talked about my family and the major causes of stress in my life. He listened very carefully to all my concerns and asked questions about my family's medical history and we discussed warning signs and things to look out for. He asked me what I was most afraid of health-wise, and he helped me create action plans for how to improve my health without condemning me, making me feel guilty, pressuring me, telling me to start a whole round of medications or thinking about surgery. He handled every poke, every prod and every needle stick with caring and professionalism.

I suppose I'm gushing a bit, but after 30 years of abject terror of going to the doctor, it is so nice to see someone who treats me like a human being. My other doctors were competent, professional, and overall caring, but this guy is above and beyond.

If you're looking for a fat friendly health professional in your area, or would like to nominate someone to the list, you can visit the list at: http://www.cat-and-dragon.com/stef/Fat/ffp.html

It's just so nice to be treated like a person and not a number on a scale. I'm glad it's over for another year, and this time I just might not wait around for 3 years before my next check up, and I feel like if (God forbid) something shows up that's not great in my blood tests, we'd work it out as a team--not him as the dictator and me as the minion--and it would be OK. AMEN FOR GREAT MEDICINE!

Huh?

I haven't blogged in almost a week, so you're getting a few quickies tonight. Plus, I can't sleep. Quit complaining. hehe

I saw a bumper sticker on a car today that really confused the crap out of me.

The car had Texas plates and the bumper sticker read: "My governor is a Jewish cowboy."

As my friend Debbie would say, "What!?"

The Latest Round of Hilarious Spammer Names (And Perhaps Final)

I'm getting the feeling I might be the only one who continues to find these amusing, and as they're few and far between (this latest round has taken a few months to compile--since January), I think I'll just go on back to deleting everything in my spam folder as it comes in.

Be that as it may, may I present the final list of hilarious spammer names direct from my inbox...

Polygamy P. Format
Rubes L. Rubdowns
Udders B. Counted
Riesling R. Thoroughbreds
Hellenistic G. Hothead
Canute O. Coolant
Sexism U. Whetstone
Schnauzers M. Crosier
Sinai E. Linnaeus
Foregathered H. Troubled
Cookbook S. Telegraphed
Flops Q. Impulsion
Cluttering H. Paramilitaries
Violable B. Underwriters
Trailering D. Conic
Prophylactic F. Somnambulists (!!!!)
Paralleling H. Homesteaders
Underdone R. Tartness
Facing E. Indispensable
Groupie K. Baker
Domineering L. Rutledge
Unappetizing T. Psychologies (hehe)
Scarlet L. Imperturbable
Permanents K. Puberty
Draco U. Deposed
Iraqi B. Homograph
Hamlet B. Lipstick
Immigration O. Administratively
Subtrahends A. Ishmael
Deleted I. Grossness (poetic, no?)
Minutemen L. Pilothouse
Broccoli H. Downloads
Careers D. Wail
Sock E. Values
Hooves O. Locution
Michigander D. Beowulf

Hope this last round was as enjoyable for you as it was for me! :)

The New Baby

We've had our first experience haggling at a car dealership and one that I hope does not bear repeating in the next several years. But we've got a new car out of the deal, and one that's sporty, comfortable, and still compact. I drove one as a rental car and fell in love, so decided to take advantage of a friends/family discount and we took a test drive of a new Caliber this past weekend. Michael and I made it work for us, and here we have our new baby. The beauty of it is, we came home and applied for a different loan than the one at the dealership was offering to finance us with (in spite of our excellent credit--their words), and got a full percentage point off the loan. Yahoo!

It was so bittersweet to leave the Saturn behind. It was the first brand new car I ever had, only 21 miles on it when I bought her, and she was fun to drive, if leaving us a few aches and pains after our trips to Rhode Island and NY and Florida. We had some fun times in that car--trips to North and South Carolina, trips home, trips to the hospital and orthopedist, travels in DC on cold nights just to see the Capitol building lit up and just to revel in the one thing we'd ever owned that no one else owned before us. I'm happy that we'll have the same adventures in the new car, but it is a bit of an adjustment to say the least. So I cried and gave her a kiss, and drove away from her, quietly thanking her for her reliability, sweet temperament, and the joie de vivre we felt encased within her.

The only thing left to do is give the new car a name. Any suggestions? :-)

Are We Getting Stupider?

What's with these commercials for Ambien and Lunesta, two FDA approved sleep medications, that now warn you the drugs may cause drowsiness!? Is anyone really so stupid to think that they'll take a sleep medication and feel awake and alert?

I shake my head and wonder how humankind has managed to survive these thousands of years.

Rehoboth Beach, 2007

Las Vegas

So, we're back (clearly), and it was one hell of a trip. It was in many ways the perfect vacation for us and I'm so glad we went.

When we arrived, it was utter chaos. There was advertising everywhere, limo drivers looking for their pick ups, rows of baggage claims spitting out suitcases, tons of people. We were very fortunate in that our suitcases arrived quickly and the instant we walked out the door there was a hotel shuttle service and we were able to get a ticket and get on the next departing bus. This carried a downside, however, in that we stopped at a whole pile of hotels before we ever got to ours. So many, in fact, that we decided to spring for the extra $5 on the way back to the airport on Wednesday and got a cab so we could go directly to the airport without a bunch of intermediary stops. Still, the shuttle driver was very nice and gave a nice tour of the city and made recommendations on what to do and where to stay.

The Circus Circus lobby was little better. In fact, perhaps worse, since there was a HUGE line snaking through those tensabarriers and it was chock full of families with little kids running in and out and around, shrieking and carrying on. It took us 45 minutes to get to the desk, and then we literally had to get a map to find our room, the casino was so big. This was our first hint that walking was probably not going to happen.

After getting settled, we went to eat at a little fast food Mexican/Italian place which was quite good except the fire alarm went off in the middle of the meal, complete with flashing strobe lights! But, who cares? We liked the food and retired on full bellies. Circus Circus's hotel facilities were certainly adequate--they were nothing to scream about in terms of luxury, but were nicer than the Motel 6. Since we're not extravagant people, we were completely pleased with our room, which came with some nice travel guides to the area and extra pillows.

Saturday was our first full day in Las Vegas. We had read in the travel guides that there was a trolley that ran every 15 minutes, and having determined that the strip runs about 6.3 miles, we decided we'd take the trolley instead of trying to walk (Michael's been diagnosed with arthritis in his back). When we got there, a guy at the "Slots-O-Fun" told us the bus was cheaper and faster, so we bought all day passes for the bus and then decided to walk across the street to the Riviera for the buffet, which I had read about and thought sounded pretty good.

In fact, it was not that exciting. There was plenty of food, sure, but most of it looked like it had been sitting around for some time. So I was disappointed with our first buffet. Then we decided to walk out the back entrance and go over to the Hilton, which was "just across the street", to pick up our Barry Manilow tickets.

"Just across the street" took us about 20 minutes! Seriously, the casinos are massive. Even the old ones are huge. I couldn't get over it. We arrived and Michael was getting a bit sore, so we decided I would find the box office, which was right up front, and then we decided to play the slots. Since I'm cheap, we played the penny slots, and by some miracle, I won $50 on the Wheel of Fortune. So, we were conservative and cashed out. Then we went down to the Star Trek place, since Joe had given us the assignment to get a picture of the General making a face at the mannequins of the characters from Star Trek. Mission accomplished, and we decided to take the Monorail to Caesar's Palace, since I had gotten a couple of free passes on it for buying tours and whatnot on Vegas.com.

The monorail is GORGEOUS. It's clean, efficient, speedy, and accessible. We got off at the Flamingo and strolled through there on our way to Caesar's, and it was nice. They have a beautiful courtyard with flamingos, and I got to see some of them. Then we headed over to Caesar's to pick up our tickets for Celine Dion.

Let me tell you now, Caesar's is MASSIVE. It's even more massive than it looks from the outside. We were all over the place looking for the box office, with nothing more than a sign reading "Apian Way" or "Via Yadda Yadda" or whatever aiming us in the right direction. Fortunately we found it, but by then, we needed another quick break, so I put Michael in front of the Bark Day something penny slot machine and he promptly won $60. Man were we feeling good. So of course, we cashed out, and left before Lady Luck won her moolah back. :-)

It was getting late by then, so we decided to head back to Circus Circus to shower and change for the Barry Manilow concert and have some dinner. The concert was GREAT. He allows you to take pictures during the show and they give you free glowsticks when you arrive, so that was really neat. Barry sang a bunch of our old favorites and we were singing along, having a grand old time. And I was pleased to note that there were a lot of people our age or younger there--definitely all of us had grown up with Barry since the 70's. Fun, fun, fun. I got a program and collected some of the streamers they shoot out at the end of the show. Then we headed back to sleep, as we had an early morning on Sunday.

Sunday was our busiest day with a tour and a show. We headed off to the Hoover Dam at 7:45, again taking a shuttle that stopped at a bunch of casinos after ours. Still, it was a great way to see the strip and we loved taking the ride around and seeing some of the places we hadn't seen the day before. I was particularly taken with the New York New York (obviously) and the Excalibur.

We boarded the big bus at Bally's and then took the ride out to the Hoover Dam via Boulder City. The desert was absolutely gorgeous, breathtaking, and spectacular. And the Hoover Dam? WOW. That's all I can say. WOW. We took the tour inside and then we had about an hour to walk the dam itself. How much of a loser am I, but I had no idea that the halfway point of the dam marks the border between Nevada and Arizona, so of course, we had to walk over to Arizona, as I'd never been before. The lake created by the dam is gorgeous, the river is spectacular, just an amazing tour. Go there. You will not be sorry!

On our way back, we stopped at Ethel M Chocolates and the Cactus Botanical Gardens which is behind it. It was a giant tourist trap--a subsidiary of some sort of the Mars Company, they charge $32 for a small box of truffles, and the factory was not in operation while we were there. The garden was small, although many of the cacti were in bloom and I got a couple of good shots on the new camera. Still, if anyone tries to convince you that your trip to Vegas won't be complete without a stop at Ethel M's, laugh in their face and save your money! The General and I bought some left over Easter candy, which admittedly was damned good, but we wouldn't have missed out on anything had that part of the tour been skipped.

As soon as we got back, we took a brief nap, and then freshened up and headed to Caesar's Palace to see Celine! Unlike Barry, Celine has restrictions about what can go into her theater, so I had to check in my backpack. We were spared the indignity of the metal detectors, courtesy of the General's white cane, and we got to be seated before anyone else was! The show was spectacular. It was choreographed by one of the Cirque du Soleil guys and it was very ethereal and visually stunning. And Celine was magnificent. I about cried through the whole thing and the General even shed a few tears. When we left the theater, one of the ushers noticed the white cane ("don't leave home without it!") and went and got the backpack for us out of the coat check. Before most people left the theater, we were in a cab heading back to the hotel! It was AWESOME!

Monday was another day of sightseeing in Las Vegas itself, and we got new bus passes and headed down the strip. I wanted to take a gondola ride at the Venetian, but unfortunately the day was extremely windy and they were docked. So we went inside the Venetian and saw the gondolas on the grand canal indoors. It was one incredible shopping experience. You feel like you're outside, you can't even believe you're indoors when you're at the canal. It became my favorite place the minute we walked in. I've had a dream of going to Italy ever since seeing "While You Were Sleeping" and this really cemented it.

We also checked out Treasure Island while we were there and the gigantic Siegfried and Roy gold statue with a big lion head. Some woman tried to put her head in the lion's mouth while we were standing there and almost got her head stuck, which was hilarious.

Then we got back on the bus and went down to the Bellagio to see the fountain show, but sadly, that was also off due to the wind!! Fortunately we had seen the fountains when we were at Caesar's picking up the tickets for Celine early on in our trip, but I would have liked to have seen them for longer. We went inside the Bellagio, however, and it trumped the Venetian. I told the General we're going to work towards a goal of actually staying in one of those 3 hotels, because the Venetian, Bellagio, and Caesar's are all too beautiful for words.

We wanted to have a relaxing afternoon so we went back to Circus Circus and did some reading and I wrote out my postcards to send to our parents and assorted relatives. And then it was time to head to the Rio to see Penn and Teller. I had wrongly assumed that the box office for Penn and Teller would be open like the box offices for the other shows, and had also wrongly assumed that there were no assigned seats, that it was first come, first served. So I got there at about 5pm. And the box office didn't open until 7pm. Oops. But I looked around the Rio a little bit and then happily found a Starbucks and had a chai and a fruit tart and finished my book. It was nice to have a quiet corner to curl up and relax after the "go go go" of the previous few days and if we go again to Las Vegas, I will certainly do the same.

So, Penn and Teller were AMAZING as well. They put on a great show and did some amazing illusions, including the one for which they were famous on "The West Wing" in which they burn the American flag inside the Bill of Rights in an instant. After that trick, the two of them took off down the aisles and as we exited the theater, they were standing in the lobby to sign autographs and take pictures. So that was a lot of fun... And then I headed back to the hotel, since we had another early morning for our last big day in Las Vegas!

Tuesday was our big rafting and Hummer trip. The raft trip was first and we went on down to the Hacienda casino near Boulder City (gambling is illegal IN Boulder City, but it was near there). They gave us some cool little lunch coolers and took us by van to the base of the Hoover Dam where we got onto a large pontoon raft and motored through the Black Canyon, which our tour guide Jerry called "The Grand Canyon's bastard stepbrother". heh The scenery was gorgeous. We went down an 11 mile stretch and saw plenty of wildlife including bighorn sheep, falcons, coromorants, lizards, fish, ducks, etc. We stopped halfway at a little beach in Arizona to eat lunch, so I can officially say I was in Arizona since I ate a meal there! A few more miles down the Colorado River, Jerry pulled the raft over and told us it would be a good place to go wading since it was starting to get kind of warm in the Canyon in the sun. So I got out and stuck my feet in the water and man was it COLD!!! Jerry then laughingly told us the water was 54 degrees at the moment. It was sure refreshing, though... I took a little walk along the shoreline and found some fool's gold, which I brought back with me, and which I thought was pretty neat. Then we arrived at Willow Beach and boarded a van. Most people were on a large tour bus, but since we had to go back to the Hacienda to get the Hummer tour, we were in a van. Then the tour bus started leaking and it appeared the radiator on it was shot. Fortunately it made it back to the Hacienda, where we were quite late for the Hummer tour, and I think the tour guide was a bit nervous about it. But we found him and it turned out that Michael and I were the only 2 on the "Rebel Adventure Tour" and so we hopped into the hummer and were off.

The Hummer ride was a helluva hoot. I felt mildly ecologically irresponsible (which my father attempted to poo poo by pointing out that "the Indians and buffalo never worried about tromping around on the sand, kid."), but it was a beautiful, beautiful tour. We went to Rainbow Gardens, an area with a large fault line that pushed up different layers of rock, which are all different colors, creating a "rainbow". Some of the rock was 60+ billion years old. We also got to see Lava Butte, a now extinct volcano.

The tour guide was, in my opinion, just waiting for someone like me and the General to come along so he could ham it up in that Hummer, because our 2 hour tour stretched nearly 4 hours. We were flying out of our seats, screaming across the desert. It was so much freakin' fun. At one point, the guide wanted to go through a narrow area and put the Hummer up the side of a steep incline. Michael and I were sharing a seat in the back, and he was a good four feet higher in the air than I was. It was an absolute blast. The guide was a New Yorker like me, so that made it even more fun. He gave us some great ideas for our next trip to Las Vegas, since we were leaving in the morning.

When the tour was over and we got back to Circus Circus, it was evening and we had to eat, pack, and get ready to leave early for the airport. Again, the cab ride was the right choice for us in the morning, since we zipped straight out to the airport, got dropped right at the curb in front of United, and were in and through security in under 30 minutes, which was a miracle.

We learned a lot out there. Number one, you can walk many places, but you can't walk the entire strip. But you don't need a car. In fact, I think a car would have been a real pain in the butt. The bus was efficient and cheap at $5 for a 24 hour period--not just the day you bought it, but you have a full 24 hours to use your pass.

Additionally, everyone out there expects a tip. They basically work for tips. It's kind of like being on a cruise. So bring cash for tips. We tipped the guys who got us the taxis, we tipped buffet servers, tour guides, bus drivers, you name it, they wanted tips.

For us, the Strip was nice for a few hours, but the shows and tours of the outlying areas really did it for us. We didn't regret a single penny spent on a tour or a show. Not only did we get to see our destinations, but we got to learn a lot about the areas around Las Vegas and see how gorgeous the landscape there was.

You really can do Las Vegas pretty cheap. We didn't eat anywhere too fancy, we didn't gamble a lot of money away, so it was a good, cheap vacation for us. I can see where people get carried away out there, but we didn't and we even managed to bring back souvenirs for a few people and didn't break the bank on those either.

We saved things to do for "next time" and are already thinking about a return trip. Isn't that half the fun?

I'm so glad we went, I'm so sorry it's over. We absolutely loved every minute of our time there and I was glad we had some downtime to relax as well as all the time we spent on the go. Go to Vegas!!! You'll be glad you did!

April Reading Rundown

As I expected, April was a very slow month for me, bookwise. I've been a little bit tired lately and haven't felt like reading a whole lot, so slowed down and only read eight books, down from a high of 12. This is the first month I've thought, "Well, I might not read 100 books this year", but I also felt OK with that assessment. What with my vacation and the statewide meeting this month, I lost a week and a half of reading time, so I suppose 8 is nothing to cough at. I also wasn't reading any Little House books this month, which may have led to my downfall :-)

I also had plans to read the books that people had given me as gifts, but unfortunately I only read 1 of those and still have several to get to. Maybe in May!

Again, these may contain spoilers, so if you don't want to know what happens in a particular book, I recommend skipping to the next title. (Particularly for Such a Pretty Girl and Blue Water and The Cross Country Quilters.)

1. The Dogs of Babel by Carolyn Parkhurst. Book club selection of the month. I wound up switching to this book from The Eyre Affair (sorry, Lesley!) when I received it in the mail and discovered that the author lives in Washington DC. I read the book in 2 days and fell in love with it and contacted Ms. Parkhurst on her website to ask her if she'd be willing to speak to the book club about the book. Not only is she willing to do so, but she's willing to come to the meeting, which is amazing. The Dogs of Babel is a NY Times Notable book and won a number of awards when it came out. It tells the tale of Paul, a professor whose wife plummets to her death from a tree in the backyard. The sole witness to this event is their dog, Lorelei, and Paul in his grief becomes convinced that if he can only teach Lorelei to speak, he will learn the truth about Lexy's death (was it an accident? suicide? murder?).

The book was absolutely gripping and while the description may sound a bit silly, I started to think about what I would do if the person who gave me my life back and taught me to live again suddenly died and I was desperate to find out why and how. I really felt Paul's anguish and as I learned more and more about the eclectic and mercurial Lexi, I too wanted to know what happened and why. We are meeting with Carolyn Parkhurst next week and I'm tremendously excited to speak with her and talk with the club about the book. I'm getting positive feedback from members as well.

2. Florence of Arabia by Christopher Buckley. This was a Christmas gift from my sister, and I had it on my "to be read" shelf since then. However, meeting Christopher Buckley in person spurred me to read this one, and I must say, it was really, really enjoyable.

A shadowy arm of the US Government decides that the best way to ensure Middle East peace is to liberate the women of the kingdom of Matar, the most enlightened of the Middle East states, particularly in comparison with its neighbor, Wasabia. They enlist disgruntled State Department employee Florence Farfaletti and ask her to launch an Arab TV station catering directly to women. Allowed to pick her own crack team to launch the station, Florence enlists the help of a CIA assassin, a snappy PR man (one of the minions from Thank you for Smoking), and a bureaucratic friend who happens to be gay. The four embark on their mission with the aid of the Sheika Leila, who gets "permission" from her husband to launch the station, which he finds an attractive proposition as he can spend more time with his harem and less with his wife.

This was one great book. It started out quite hilarious and become a bit more serious towards the end as the fatwa against the staff of the station heated up and people's lives are in danger. However, it was a wildly enjoyable read and I highly recommend it. It kind of makes you wonder, "Would that really work?"

3. Such a Pretty Girl by Laura Wiess. This is a young adult book about Meredith, a fifteen year old whose father is in prison for sexually abusing her and other children in the neighborhood. When her father is locked up, Meredith is promised that she has 9 years of safety coming to her, time to grow up and get out on her own. However, in their wisdom, the parole board decides to let her father out for good behavior after only three years and the book opens on the day he is to come home.

Meredith's mother is willfully oblivious to the damage this man has caused to her only daughter, as well as to Meredith's best friend Andy, who was also abused by him and who lives across their condo complex. Meredith's father returns home and makes her mother promises about starting fresh and having another baby while trying to pick up where he left off with Meredith.

The book takes place in a very short period of time, less than a week, as Meredith decides she has to do something about her father's lack of reform in prison. It is a quick read, I read it in a couple of hours.

Due to the subject matter, this was incredibly challenging to read, despite its brevity. I wanted to love Meredith, though it was difficult, which I thought was a beautiful part of Wiess's writing--most abused kids don't allow themselves to be loved. I was actually scared when her father returned to the condo, and I wanted to smack her mother silly. So the writing was definitely fantastic. A "cannot put down" book to be sure. Get a copy if you can and read it!

4. Blue Water by A. Manette Ansay. I absolutely love A. Manette Ansay, she is definitely one of my favorite writers. I adored Sister and Vinegar Hill and to a lesser extent I enjoyed Midnight Champagne. I was unaware that she had written Blue Water, so I was excited when I ran across it unexpectedly on Amazon.com and even more thrilled when it was available on PaperbackSwap.com.

Blue Water is the tale of Meg and Rex Van Dorn, an ordinary couple living in an ordinary Wisconsin town. One day, Meg is driving their son Evan, age 6, to school and her car is rammed by Cindy Ann, her best friend from high school. Evan, Meg and Rex's miracle baby, is killed instantly. Cindy Ann and her three daughters walk away without a scratch. It is later shown that Cindy Ann was drunk at the time of the accident and has had a serious drinking problem due to abuse suffered as a child at the hands of her step father.

Unable to cope with the sight of Cindy Ann, and the fact that her own brother Toby is marrying Cindy Ann's sister, Meg decides to leave Wisconsin and she and her husband rent out their house and take up residence on a boat, sailing to escape the pain of their son's death. Rex and Meg can't agree upon what to do, whether they should launch a civil suit against Cindy Ann, who refuses to quit drinking and narrowly avoids jail time, or whether to let the whole thing drop, as Meg feels guilt over not helping her friend more during the years of torment in high school. Adding to the complicated feelings is Toby's impending wedding and his desire for his sister to be present and supportive of his new life.

This book was definitely very good, if perhaps a bit over-the-top with the complicated relationships. I found it a bit hard to swallow that Toby would completely ignore his sister's feelings and go ahead and marry a woman so close the source of his nephew's demise, and I didn't feel that Toby and Meg's brother-sister relationship, which was almost more of a father-daughter relationship, would have survived that. Meg wound up making the most sacrifices to ensure peace in the family and ultimately, I found it incomprehensible that she would wind up caring for the woman who killed her son. Still, I liked the book on the level of Midnight Champagne and was glad to have read it.

5. The Ha Ha by Dave King. I have been waiting and waiting to get my hands on a copy of The Ha Ha and was fortunate enough to get it on BookMooch.com and even more fortunate to get a pristine hardcover copy. I read the description to Michael as we were looking for a new book to read after the spectactular failure of Final Analysis (see March reading review for that one) and we decided to read this one together.

The Ha Ha tells the story of Howard Kapostash, a Vietnam veteran who left the war with a devastating head wound which impaired his ability to speak and read. He is awakened one night by his best friend and on-again-off-again flame, Sylvia, whose sister is forcing her into rehab for a cocaine habit. Sylvia wants Howard to care for her 9 year old son, Ryan, while she cleans up. The arrival of Ryan in Howard's household throws the entire home into disarray. Howard lives in the house his parents owned with 3 roommates, Laurel (an Asian American beauty from Texas) and two idiots he calls Nit and Nat, who work as housepainters by day and smoke a lot of pot by night. Howard works as a groundskeeper at a nearby convent where there is a hill he calls "The Ha Ha" and which he loves to ride to the top of on his lawn mower, as he feels an exhiliration from cresting the hill.

Ryan is a stabilizing effect on the household, bringing the four disparate roommates together in a way that none of them could have predicted--the icy Laurel who announces she has enough to do without a child underfoot falls in love with Ryan, and Nit and Nat become more stable and participate more in the household as opposed to just crashing there when they need to sleep. What happens when Sylvia leaves rehab is insane and striking and real and awful.

Michael and I loved this book. We stayed up at night in Vegas after our days were through, just trying to find out what would happen to Howard and Ryan, taking bets on the women, and enjoying the ride. The book IS a bit racy--Howard likes sex in an almost base way, and the book is also peppered with "f bombs" which made for some interesting reading in places like the airport. And in the interest of full disclosure, we recommended the book to my mom and she called the other day to ask when the book would start to "have a point" so this may not be everyone's cup of tea. We really liked it though! Good for men and women, unlike some of the girlier books I've read recently.

6. The Cross Country Quilters by Jennifer Chiaverini. Judy keeps buying them, I keep reading them. And every time I pick one of the Elm Creek Quilt books up, I think, "Damn this is kind of elementary" and then wind up thinking, "Damn, this one was better than the last."

This is the third in the series, and the third I've read, and my favorite one thus far. Five women meet at Elm Creek Quilt Camp and become quick friends. They decide to reunite in one year's time and in that time, they have to complete a block for a quilt after solving an issue confronting them in their life. Vinnie wants to see her grandson married. Megan wants to see a breakthrough with her young son who is hurting after his parents' acrimonious divorce and his father's refusal to acknowledge him any more. Donna wants to help her brilliant oldest daughter avoid a marriage she and her family are convinced is a huge mistake. Juilia must learn to quilt to save her fading career as an actress in Hollywood. And Grace is facing down a terrifying illness.

The first half of the book sets up the women's meeting and the issues each of them faces, while the latter half deals with the resolution and subsequent trip back to Elm Creek Quilt Camp to complete their quilt. I loved this book. Now, I freely admit, it all wrapped up quite tidily and neatly at the end (for instance, Julia is an actress and one of the women's children is a theater major--see any possibilities there for assistance?). And every time I read them, I think, "Oh no, this is totally predictable" and when the totally predictable ending comes, I'm so freaking happy that everything works out well in the end, that I almost hate myself for it. But I guess that the happy ending counts for something, and as long as Jennifer Chiaverinni doles them out, I'll take them. Not many authors will I say that about.

7. A Northern Light by Jennifer Donnelly. I first read about this book on Lesley's blog and I was intrigued because of the subject matter. Young Mattie Gokey is a maid at the Adirondack Mountains' Glenmore Hotel and is thrust into the center of a mystery when one of the guests is found drowned in the lake. The deceased, Grace Brown, has given Mattie a bundle of letters to destroy, and Mattie has never gotten around to doing so. As she begins to read the letters, she learns the truth about Grace and her lover, Chester Gillette.

Mattie also struggles in her own life, her desire to leave the North Woods and become a student and a writer pulling her in one direction, while the needs of her own family pull her in the other. She is further pulled by her friend Weaver, a boy her age who wants to become a lawyer and is encouraging Mattie to follow him to New York City, and Royal Loomis, who wants to marry Mattie and buy a farm.

Having grown up in the Adirondacks, this really appealed to me. And while reading the book, I was excited to read a lot of towns (Old Forge, Croghan, Inlet, Port Leyden) that I knew from growing up. In her acknowledgements, the author even mentions Cranberry Lake, where our library was located when I was growing up. So I absolutely loved the book for that reason--it made me nostalgic for home. And while it probably was not the author's intention, a lot of the names she used in the story were the names of people who are still living in the Adirondacks. For instance, there is a family in the book called the Hubbards, and I want to school with the Hubbards. Other coincidental names such as that lent it an additional air of authenticity. Additionally, I was well aware of the Grace Brown murder, an actual case which was made famous by Theodore Dreiser's An American Tragedy. It's always been a case with which I had an interest, and probably which introduced me to the world of true crime, a somewhat morbid interest I have to this day.

But I also really loved Mattie. I identified with her, a girl trying to decide whether to do what is best for herself or her family. To follow her own passions, which no one around her save her best friend and her teacher, indulge in or understand, or to stay home where she is needed and forgo her adventures in New York City. The book was more than a backwoods story about a bunch of hicks who don't know their asses from their elbows. You felt for these people, from Mattie's Pa trying to raise a bunch of girls without their mother, to dirt poor Emmie, to Weaver and his mother, to the employees of the hotel. A great book, I really enjoyed it, and as Mattie loves to play a word game with Weaver in which she looks up a new word every day, I learned some new words to expand my vocabulary. And I loved that Mattie made up her own words as well. Limicolous or terricipation, anyone?

8. The Patron Saint of Liars by Ann Patchett. Ann Patchett is probably best well known for having written Bel Canto which I am best known for not having read. But I was browsing in Borders one day and happened upon Patron Saint and was finally moved to purchase a book after several months of not having bought any really. The story centers around St. Elizabeth's, a home for unwed mothers in Kentucky in the 1960's. One night, a woman named Rose enters the home, unwilling to share her secrets, stating that her husband has died and she will give her baby up for adoption. However, St. Elizabeth's is perched on the site of a dried up spring that produced miraculous healings, and when Rose's time to deliver approaches, she finds that she cannot go through with her plans to give away her baby and leave.

The book is peppered with a cast of interesting characters, including the nuns who run the home, Rose herself, Son the caretaker, and the other expectant mothers who come in and out of the home. It was a compelling read, not only to discover how Rose's past will rectify itself, but also how her years of story telling affect the life her daughter ultimately will lead. Rose is not, to me, a particularly sympathetic character, but I did find her compelling. The book ended a bit abruptly for my tastes, but definitely no neat happy ending on this one, which made up for the quilting book. I read this one at a more leisurely pace than some of the others, and I enjoyed it a lot. Solid chick lit, so if you're into that, give it a try.

So that's it for April, short and sweet. I like to list the books I'll be reading next month, as I never usually get around to half of them, but I'll be taking a crack at A Thousand Acres by Jane Smiley, Naked by David Sedaris, and Gods in Alabama by Joshilynn Jackson.

The Great: Such a Pretty Girl, A Northern Light, The Ha Ha, Florence of Arabia, The Dogs of Babel

The Good: Blue Water, The Patron Saint of Liars, The Cross Country Quilters

The OK: (none)

The Awful: (none)

Totals for April:

Books Read: 8
Pages Read: 2471

Totals for 2007:

Books Read: 36
Pages Read: 11,080

We're Back!

What a time we had!!! I've got to go to work, sadly, but I have stories and they'll be here soon. It was probably the best vacation we've ever taken. We're already planning our return trip... So, enjoy these few pictures to whet your appetites, and when I'm back on Eastern time and haven't got to catch up too much on anyone, I'll be back--the next few days at home are INSANE... (We're going to a Pentagon ceremony, my sister's birthday party, and she's coming here to name a few)

Checked In!

I love online check in for flights! :-)

We're flying out of Dulles this afternoon on United, and last time we did so, it was a complete and utter disaster. We were on 3 different lines, and it took FOREVER. Today, I checked in on line and all we have to do is go check in our bags when we get there. How easy is that!? :-)

Life is good. See you all next week.

Tal Did It, so I Had to Copy Cat Him

Your Linguistic Profile:

50% General American English

30% Yankee

10% Upper Midwestern

5% Dixie

0% Midwestern

What Kind of American English Do You Speak?

And Now is When Depression Sets In...

I got home today and found a pile of mail in the strangest place--halfway up the stairs. But I was tremendously excited, because the proof of my soon-to-be-publicly-released photography book was in there.

But I forced myself to read all my other mail first, since I'm never really good with suspense, and I'm trying to learn patience.

Maybe I should have looked at the book first.

What came in the mail?

None other than the invitation to my 10 year college reunion.

And then it hit me.

I've been out of college for ten stinkin' years. I didn't START college ten years ago, no no no, I FINISHED college ten years ago.

So young, so idealistic, big plans, big dreams, not a whole lot of which revolved around driving a car for a living, I can assure you. I had grand visions of foreign travel, diplomacy, perhaps a tony post on the Mediterranean... At least a secretarial job in the State Department, where I'd quickly be noticed for my brilliance and made a liaison or attache...

But alas, Fate has other plans at the moment. Maybe in my next life... Or maybe just later on in this one.

I won't be going to my reunion--it's the same weekend as the planned Myrtle Beach excursion. I'm glad I'll be surrounded by friends on whose shoulders I can cry.

If You Want a Good Laugh...

...click here.

Questions From My Father In Law

1. How many times did Imus say "Nappy Headed Ho's"? Once. How many times has the media repeated it? Countless.

2. How come Oprah Winfrey didn't ask the girls what they had on their iPods? And if it's that despicable rap music, why not take them to task on that?

3. Why haven't Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson apologized to the Duke lacrosse players yet?

Friday the 13th, DC Style

Yesterday was Friday the 13th, and I was skating along thinking it wasn't going to be such a bad day, till I turned on Washington Post radio and got the traffic report. At 6am, some guy rammed his truck into a jersey wall here in Fredericksburg and his truck caught fire and melted I95.

Still, I thought, how bad can it be? They'll repair the road, and I'm not heading down I95 today, I'm heading up it.

Michael and I were heading yesterday evening to see Cal Ripken Jr. at Tyson's Corner.

But the joke was on us. Over by where he works, DDOT had decided to do construction on the bridge on I-295.

So we had plans to meet in Vienna at 6:15pm. I had to go to Charlottesville yesterday, and had already driven almost 300 miles by the time I got up to Vienna (Fredericksburg to Manasssas to Charlottesville to Fredericksburg to Vienna). What makes me sick about that is I could be most of the way to my father's house in that many miles. Hell, I could be most of the way to anywhere in that many miles.

But I digress.

So by then, the traffic from the truck fire had gotten out of control. The road had never cooled off enough to repair and all the Looky Loos had slowed down traffic so badly, and all the locals had jumped on the local roads to avoid the highway, and there was no going anywhere. Traffic at 6pm was backed up THIRTY MILES.

And Michael was stuck on base.

And I was without a cell phone, yet again. Why does this crap happen when I give up the cell phone!?

So I got up to Vienna in plenty of time, ran into my "nephew" while I was sitting in the parking lot waiting, and suddenly it was 6:30. So I was sick of sitting the car, and got out and grabbed some pictures with my new camera. Got back in the car, read for a bit. Then I figured, well, if the General's not here by 7:30, maybe he went home and ditched me. I don't know. Fortunately, I found him at 7pm. (I really expected him to be early--I sat in that freakin' parking lot for almost 2 hours.)

So we decided to give up on Cal Ripken, which also started at 7pm, because the Beltway was a mess. The radio said not to try I95 until at least 8pm, so we went to Joe's, our favorite pizza place, and sat there till almost 9pm. We got a traffic report, which said 95 was heavy but moving, and took a chance.

When we got to Dale City, it was just plain heavy, so I took a chance again and hopped on Route 1, which was crystal clear, and we sailed down that at about 60MPH and made it home in about an hour and 10 minutes. But damn!

As I was driving north, I was mentally composing my, "Honey, we're moving" speech. Even his little scheme that we should move to Alabama doesn't sound half bad about now.

LOST

I don't know how they do it. Every episode of Lost ends on a cliffhanger such as most other shows only manage at the end of each season. And damn if tonight doesn't have me on tenterhooks... WHO IS JULIET?!?!?!?!?! WHAT THE HELL ARE THE OTHERS UP TO!?!?!?!?!? WHAT IS LOCKE DOING?!?!?!?!?! AUGH! And only 5 episodes left this season...